Sweet Revenge. The Good Kind.

Revenge is sweet sometimes. Yes, the feeling of getting even is gratifying but often times it comes about by a mean act, sinful really. Sometimes revenge can be a way to settle the score, nicely. A time when nobody gets hurt but the message is heard. I found myself in the most unlikely of situations to kindly get even, sweet revenge in my book. I was giggly with satisfaction, no guilt.

Ahh.  Sweet.

Ahh. Sweet.

With social media, revenge is pretty easy. I’m thinking of those in business of servicing others and not a jaded lover or a friend. (That kind of revenge is messy. Just ask any Hollywood star, sports figure or politician.) Sometimes I think restaurants; retail stores or physicians forget we don’t live in pre-Facebook or pre-yelp times any more. Informing our fellow consumer of iffy service-providers is almost a public duty not really revenge, like a storm warning.

Say for example your family went to a hot new Japanese restaurant on Fourth Street in Berkeley (starts with an ‘I’ and ends with an ‘E’) where the wait to be seated with a reservation was twenty minutes. And say for example once seated the waiter completely ignored your table for another twenty minutes, walking past five times without even a wink or “just a minute.” Well, it’s very easy to say ‘enough is enough’ and walk two doors down to a very friendly, customer-focused Mediterranean restaurant called ZUT to sip cocktails while writing a critical yelp review on a smartphone about the no-service place. And say maybe somebody at the table has a blog. Wow. That’s pretty sweet and so helpful for everyone.

Smells good at least.

Smells good at least.

In Northern California, we don’t have mosquitoes so much in the summer. The real pests are yellow jackets, a protein-seeking wasp usually found at an outdoor dinner gathering. Yellow jackets can really break-up a garden party and send the crowd indoors. Precautions can be taken such as an organized person setting yellow-colored traps weeks in advance for best results. Or for the more last-minute type, spreading dryer sheets around the table to throw off the meaty scent kind of works but the table is ugly. I swear, I never thought a payback was possible with a pesky yellow jacket until one day…

 

Feast fit for man or yellow-jacket.

Feast fit for man or yellow-jacket.

I prepared the grill for a steak. I noticed several yellow jackets buzzing around the BBQ, darting furiously in search of a protein fix. Something was driving them insane. Once I lifted the lid I saw why. Remnants of dried salmon clung to the greasy black bars from the last cookout. I watched the greedy buzzers zoom in for the feast like a vulture on a road-kill squirrel. I could taste the sweet revenge. A smile crept across my face like the Grinch masterminding his Christmas heist from Whoville. I wanted to laugh a sinister laugh but I didn’t know how. I giggled instead and thought how pleased my boys would be with me. I couldn’t wait to push the igniter button, sending flames shooting two feet up into the air. The rascally yellow jackets narrowly missed the licks of fire. Just watching them zip up with fright and out of sight was thrilling. They lived to share a helpful message with friends, “Don’t dine at the fiery restaurant,” just like the one we sent out to fellow diners.

Lesson Book.

Lesson Book.

Being a parent provides plenty of opportunity for the sweet revenge I’m talking about. We frequently teach our kids a lesson. I noticed my boys treated me like a walking dictionary rather than look up anything on their own. I also noticed their writing needed improvement. My solution: Learn by example. Read any article from the Sunday New York Times, long or short. Summarize it for me and define any new words. Grumbles and furry eyeballs were the initial feedback. Imagine my surprise when the word definitions came up for discussion. The sweet revenge came back as sweet sibling rivalry.

“Trove? You picked trove for your unknown word?” cried out my youngest son.

“I don’t know what it means. Do you?” My oldest son asked him.

“No. But MY word is microentrepreneur.” Retorts the younger son. Clearly his word sounds more sophisticated and is much longer than trove.

“Microentrepreneur? You had to look that up? You couldn’t just figure it out? Says my oldest son.

Sweet revenge is soo sweet.

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Electronic Dance Music and Sriracha Festival

I was hip for two hours with my family at the Electronic Dance Music (EDM) and Sriracha Food Festival in San Jose. Food trucks featured the tasty hot sauce in their signature dishes be it tacos, poutines or cupcakes. I just knew my boys would like it, particularly the youngest. My husband would love it…

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College Tour 2014: University of British Columbia, Vancouver

The University of British Columbia was the last stop on the Summer 2014 college tour.  The other schools we toured included:  University of Oregon, University of Washington and University of Puget Sound. As long as we were in Seattle, we thought a “quick” drive across the Canadian border to Vancouver would make a fine stop. (Not quick!)  …

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College Tour 2014: University of Puget Sound

The University of Puget Sound was the third stop on the Summer 2014 college tour*.  Our tour guide made the hour long walk around campus an entertaining and welcoming experience.  She encouraged everyone to talk and tried to match up their interests with someone she knew for a duet, i.e. my son and her friend for…

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College Tour 2014: University of Washington

The University of Washington was our second stop on the Summer 2014 college tour.  The other schools we toured included:  University of Oregon, University of Puget Sound, University of British Columbia. Our guide was pretty smart, just like the school.  He said coming from a small town the big school was an adjustment but it…

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College Tour 2014: Oregon University

Summer 2014 was packed with college tours. Our oldest is going to be a junior and because we are planners, we are starting the college hunt now. I don’t know how much fun he is having with the search, but the parents are really into it. Neither mom nor dad had a choice; we went…

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BlogHer14: My first blog conference.

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LA: It’s About the Doughnuts

Doughnuts and LA go together about as well as candy bars and diet pills, at least that’s what I used to think. To me, LA conjures up images of beaches, bikinis, movie stars and Malibu Barbie. A recent trip to LA was anything but a suntanned and slender experience. We stayed inland, about an hour…

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Retinal Detachment: A Public Service Announcement.

For about a week, I had a “smudge” at the corner of my left eye. All I wanted to do was clean my glasses or my contacts but the smudge didn’t go away. I kept thinking of a photo a stranger took of my husband, my 14-month-old and me in front of the Louvre in…

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Francie on YouTube

Four years ago, I didn’t know much about blogs or how the camera on my phone worked.  Now I know three platforms for blogging.  I have a camera app on my phone so I can edit photos creatively and easily.  I have a personal page and a blog page on facebook; I love facebook now…

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